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New Book Alert – The Iron Trial by Cassandra Clare and Holly Black

2 Jul

mag

 

As per Goodreads:

Twelve-year-old Callum Hunt has grown up knowing three rules by heart. Never trust a magician. Never pass a test a magician gives you. And never let a magician take you to the Magisterium. Callum is about to break all the rules. And when he does, his life will change in ways he can’t possibly imagine.

Book One in the Magisterium Series – potentially a FIVE BOOK series.

The Magisterium series is a five-book series of fantasy novels, one book for each year of Call’s life between twelve and seventeen, cowritten with Holly Black (author of The Spiderwick Chronicles and the Modern Faerie Tale series) about Call Hunt and his adventures. The first book, The Iron Trial, will be published by Scholastic Books in 2014. Holly and I also have an option deal to produce the film along with Constantin Features.

Release date: October 2, 2014

 

My Reaction:

Two badass YA fantasy writers coming together to write something that sounds like Harry Potter fan fic?

 

OsWOlUT

(sorry about the wonky gif, just click on it)

faint

 

Seriously, Holly, Cassandra… I will seduce a publisher for a signed ARC of this book.

seduce

 

Mark it as a To Read Here

 

 

 

 

 

Asunder by Jodi Meadows

2 Jul

13043180

Book Two in the Newsoul Series

Rating: One out of Five Stars

I am going to give everyone a heads up… this review will be snarktastic.

So I’ve had some time to step away from this book and allow my feelings to mellow out a bit. But sadly, my rating is not changing from a One Star. I know a lot of people ohemgee-loved-this-book but I have to, respectively, disagree. Please please don’t hate me for this review.

Be warned: There are spoilers aplenty in this.

And I apologize in advance for my swearing. *Sowwy*

Alright:

bmode

What, in all that is good and holy in this world, the f**k was Meadows thinking with this disaster of book? I don’t think I’ve read something so disorganized as this plot or as weak and pathetic as a main a character since 50 Shades of Bullshit landed in my unknowing lap. And the worst part about my hatred of this book was that I gave Incarnate FOUR STARS! Four freaking stars. Talk about fab to drab in 400 pages. Good lord I would rather torture myself with entire 1500 page Matched series again before I would submit to reading Asunder a second time. It was painfully awful. And I can actually say PAINFULLY because I rolled my eyes so many times while I went through chapters of this book I gave myself a headache. A self-induced, eye rolling headache. If that doesn’t scream “bad book” I don’t know WHAT does.

To be fair, I will list my grievances in a civilized and decent manner and feel free to argue against any of the following points:

1.) As expressed clearly in my review of Incarnate, the world building was extremely lacking. But I think I had tricked myself into thinking that it was acceptable in Book One because the concept was so new. Perhaps my WSOD meter was just catching up?  Now though, the newness has worn off and I am left with this jumble of words and bullshit that is attempting to congeal it’s self into some semblance of a working plot. For example: There’s only one effing city in the whole world (planet? land? Earth? Universe?) and it can house a million people? And yet you can walk from one side of the city to the other in a day. A city where every single “soul” has their own house, with their own yard? Riiight. OK yeah that makes PERFECT F*CKING SENSE. And this glorious city that just sits on this volcano just “happens” to have the right amount of houses with walls that, excuse me, pulse? Cool, nbd, awesome. Let me just segway into my next point on that creepy shit..

2.)Sooo… our “bad guy” is actually the wall that pulses? Who is actually Janan?  Who is a god but USED to be a real person? And he’s the reason that everything happens in this god-forsaken world/land/planet?

confused
No, that’s not confusing at all. Totally understand THAT connection. Moving on.

(If you don’t get the sarcasm in the points above, shame on you. Just stop reading now)

Ok so besides the completely illogical world that is never fully described and the creepy as f*ck wall/bad guy/god thingy, we could almost save this book at a couple stars if we had a solid main character and a good romance. But alas, that was not to be found in this darling book. Proceed on, oh bitchy rant!

3.) Ana. Young, innocent, naive, newsoul Ana. How I wish you had one ounce of redeeming qualities in you. Instead, if I saw you on the streets, I would throw a rock at you too, you stupid fickle twat. Now here is my biggest beef with Meadows at the moment: WHY DID YOU CHANGE ANA SO MUCH? Yes, she was indecisive and and yes, she kind of made no sense in her decisions making, but at least she was endearing! You tried too hard and tried to accomplish so much with her and it just fell so flat. Everything became soo… coincidental. She just “happens” to have the key that “happens” to be the clue to unlocking this whole messed up Janan crap? I can see how Ana was trying to be this Grand Savior and all that but she just.. wasn’t. She’s weak. Annoying, self-centered and weak. And she has a wrapped and twisted review on reality, I feel sorry for the poor thing. I mean come on, she would NEVER confront Sam on anything. Ana was so terrified of making him mad or uncomfortable or upset she never DID anything. She was so forgiving (practically instantaneously) that every time she “got mad” I pictured a 2 year old stomping her feet for 30 seconds than moving onto the next toy. And her morals went out the window. She wanted to wait to have sex in Incarnate but she was like a two dollar hussy in Asunder. Ugh.

4.) And don’t even get me STARTED on Sam and their “romance”. Seriously. Don’t.

shot

I could really go on and on.. but I’ll save myself a hand cramp and your most likely bleeding ears from my never-ending spiel of how disappointed I am with this book. I will read the third, purely because I did enjoy the first so much and because I adore Jodi Meadows. But lord help me if it’s as twisted and stupid as the second.
going to hell

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